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	<title>Safety &#8211; The University of Abject Submission</title>
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	<description>BDSM, books and missing links by Xiao Yingtai</description>
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		<title>It&#8217;s a Bad Day for Rope Consent</title>
		<link>/it-is-a-bad-day-for-rope/</link>
					<comments>/it-is-a-bad-day-for-rope/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Xiao Yingtai]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 24 Apr 2015 05:03:09 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Safety & Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">/?p=6123</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;m troubled by the recent consent violation news in the FetLife rope community. I need to clear a crazy work deadline before I write about it, but I thought I would at least share the reports with you for now. Please note that you will need a FetLife login (it&#8217;s free). And if you want &#8230; <a href="/it-is-a-bad-day-for-rope/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">It&#8217;s a Bad Day for Rope Consent</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/it-is-a-bad-day-for-rope/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>Jian Ghomeshi: Scum of the Earth</title>
		<link>/jian-ghomeshi-scum-of-the-earth/</link>
					<comments>/jian-ghomeshi-scum-of-the-earth/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Xiao Yingtai]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 29 Oct 2014 07:56:05 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Reality Check]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The view from up there]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">/?p=5321</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Jian Ghomeshi. The name makes me so angry. You say to your colleague, &#8220;I want to hate-fuck you,&#8221; and then you claim you&#8217;ve been fired for Safe Sane Consensual? You&#8217;re a professional communicator and somehow your partners keep walking into your home unaware that you&#8217;re going to whack their heads and choke them unconscious? You &#8230; <a href="/jian-ghomeshi-scum-of-the-earth/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">Jian Ghomeshi: Scum of the Earth</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/jian-ghomeshi-scum-of-the-earth/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>9</slash:comments>
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>Top Trust: Guest Post by Dr.&#160;Slut</title>
		<link>/top-trust/</link>
					<comments>/top-trust/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Dr. Slut]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 06 Aug 2014 04:33:06 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Safety & Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Devil on my back]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Guest posts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scening]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The view from up there]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">/?p=4544</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Today&#8217;s guest post is about an ethical top&#8217;s second-worst nightmare. Trigger warning: Rape role-play, pushing boundaries, hardcore knives. We’re so used to talking about bottoms trusting tops. It seems so obvious: if you’re going to let somebody beat you up, stab you with needles, shove a fist up your ass, whip you, dangle you by &#8230; <a href="/top-trust/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">Top Trust: Guest Post by Dr.&#160;Slut</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/top-trust/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>When a Dom Drops Hard: Guest Post by Cowhideman</title>
		<link>/when-a-dom-drops-hard/</link>
					<comments>/when-a-dom-drops-hard/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Cowhideman]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 01 Aug 2014 04:05:45 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Safety & Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Devil on my back]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Guest posts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scening]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The view from up there]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">/?p=4521</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Today&#8217;s guest blogger is Cowhideman, the patient and prolific leader of FetLife&#8217;s Novices &#38; Newbies group (login required). Crucially for us, he&#8217;s also brave enough to talk about the glory and horror of topspace. Enjoy! In a recent discussion thread, someone mentioned that their relatively novice Dom has suddenly shut down and very nearly stopped &#8230; <a href="/when-a-dom-drops-hard/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">When a Dom Drops Hard: Guest Post by Cowhideman</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/when-a-dom-drops-hard/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>4</slash:comments>
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>Subs Need Classes Too!</title>
		<link>/subs-need-classes-too/</link>
					<comments>/subs-need-classes-too/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Xiao Yingtai]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 07 Jul 2014 04:52:55 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[How to do it]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Favourites]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rec lists]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The view from down here]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">/?p=4252</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Edit: The Little Guide to Getting Tied Up has answered practically all my prayers below. I don&#8217;t even do rope and I want to memorise it. Hallelujah! Summer is convention season. People keep telling me they can&#8217;t meet up because they&#8217;re going to be at hotels, camps or tea parties. So I&#8217;ve been looking through &#8230; <a href="/subs-need-classes-too/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">Subs Need Classes Too!</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/subs-need-classes-too/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>15</slash:comments>
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>I Stand Corrected: Four Months of Blogging</title>
		<link>/i-stand-corrected/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Xiao Yingtai]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Tue, 24 Jun 2014 04:01:21 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Bloggery]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Devil on my back]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Roundups]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TMI]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">/?p=3964</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Last week my blog was four months old. And I am stunned to realise that I&#8217;ve learnt more about my kink in four months of blogging than in a year of intensive reading before that. Unfortunately, that means that I&#8217;ve said things on this blog that I no longer believe. It&#8217;s time for me to &#8230; <a href="/i-stand-corrected/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">I Stand Corrected: Four Months of Blogging</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>Consent Alone Is Not Enough: Guest&#160;Post by david&#160;stein</title>
		<link>/consent-alone-is-not-enough/</link>
					<comments>/consent-alone-is-not-enough/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[david stein]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 14 Jun 2014 11:30:04 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Safety & Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Clichés]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Guest posts]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">/?p=3970</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[I asked david stein if this important essay has been posted anywhere outside FetLife, and he promptly gave me permission to repost it here.I don&#8217;t deserve the honour. This is the man who originated &#8220;Safe, Sane and Consensual&#8221; and much more.But let&#8217;s seize the chance to read the essay here and now, before I manage &#8230; <a href="/consent-alone-is-not-enough/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">Consent Alone Is Not Enough: Guest&#160;Post by david&#160;stein</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/consent-alone-is-not-enough/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>Diabolical Genius, or I&#160;Love Interrogation</title>
		<link>/diabolical-genius/</link>
					<comments>/diabolical-genius/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Xiao Yingtai]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 26 May 2014 18:25:17 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[I Did It]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Eek!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Favourites]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scening]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Since feeling is first]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The view from down here]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TMI]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">/?p=3478</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Eric Pride has left the community in the wake of pro-consent movements, stating that we have started tearing each other apart instead of standing by each other. I&#8217;m sad that he is not who I thought he was. This post is part of the Eek! series. Also an e[lust] top three pick! Eric Pride is &#8230; <a href="/diabolical-genius/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">Diabolical Genius, or I&#160;Love Interrogation</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/diabolical-genius/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>12</slash:comments>
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>Am I Part of the Problem?</title>
		<link>/am-i-part-of-the-problem/</link>
					<comments>/am-i-part-of-the-problem/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Xiao Yingtai]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Mon, 26 May 2014 01:00:03 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Reality Check]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Devil on my back]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gender]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The view from up there]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[TMI]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">/?p=3531</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[Two months ago I called for BDSM bloggers to write about vanilla tragedies. Now the blogosphere is churning with horror at the UC Santa Barbara mass shooting by Elliot Rodger. But nobody seems to be answering the first question I asked myself: Am I part of the problem? I&#8217;m a straight submissive woman. I was &#8230; <a href="/am-i-part-of-the-problem/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">Am I Part of the Problem?</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/am-i-part-of-the-problem/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>Ariel Castro: The Psychopath in the Mirror?</title>
		<link>/ariel-castro-the-unheeded-call/</link>
					<comments>/ariel-castro-the-unheeded-call/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Xiao Yingtai]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sat, 29 Mar 2014 12:30:22 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Reality Check]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[BDSM]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Devil on my back]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Favourites]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The vanilla dialogues]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The view from up there]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://abjectsub.wordpress.com/?p=1623</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[&#8220;Help me, I&#8217;m Amanda Berry &#8230; I&#8217;ve been kidnapped, and I&#8217;ve been missing for ten years.&#8221; We all remember that 911 call last May. And then those terrible words in the news. Sex slavery. Chains, leashes. Torture. The stuff of our fantasies, now a spotlighted horrorhouse. It was so hard to hear about it. It &#8230; <a href="/ariel-castro-the-unheeded-call/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">Ariel Castro: The Psychopath in the Mirror?</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/ariel-castro-the-unheeded-call/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>15</slash:comments>
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>I&#8217;m Assertive Because I&#8217;m Weak &#8211;&#160;And Unashamed</title>
		<link>/i-am-assertive-because-i-am-weak/</link>
					<comments>/i-am-assertive-because-i-am-weak/#comments</comments>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Xiao Yingtai]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Sun, 09 Mar 2014 01:00:01 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Safety & Ethics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dating & mingling]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Devil on my back]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Favourites]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gender]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Safety]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The view from down here]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://abjectsub.wordpress.com/?p=580</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[I have read that American women feel obliged to seem cheerful and friendly to strangers, even when they&#8217;re actually grumpy or scared. Not being American, this was difficult for me to believe until a domme friend told me about something terrifying that happened to her, just walking to the train station. Maybe you&#8217;ll think it &#8230; <a href="/i-am-assertive-because-i-am-weak/" class="more-link">Continue reading <span class="screen-reader-text">I&#8217;m Assertive Because I&#8217;m Weak &#8211;&#160;And Unashamed</span> <span class="meta-nav">&#8594;</span></a>]]></description>
		
					<wfw:commentRss>/i-am-assertive-because-i-am-weak/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
			<slash:comments>6</slash:comments>
		
		
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