Tag Archives: Scening

A hand holding out an apple

My Emotional Masochism Isn’t Therapy

A hand holding out an apple

Last week, guest blogger Cava Supernova asked, provocatively, “Is racism sexy?” She told us the story of an early kink encounter in which an awesome black man begged her to call him her nigger and her sex slave boy. This out-of-the-blue request floored poor Cava and she asked us to help her figure it out. […]

Superman toy eye-to-eye with rubber chicken

You Want Reactions? (Part 1)

Superman toy eye-to-eye with rubber chicken

The number one top complaint is definitely “I can’t read your mind!” But it gets stiff competition from its close cousin: “Give me real reactions, dammit!” This I can sympathise with. Scening is all about what’s going on in the bottom’s head. Me and my kind naturally have privileged access to this contested territory, but […]

A prostrate Tigger offering a candy cane in both front paws

Top Trust: Guest Post by Dr. Slut

A prostrate Tigger offering a candy cane in both front paws

Today’s guest post is about why I am possibly an ethical top’s second-worst nightmare. Ouch. Trigger warning: Rape role-play, pushing boundaries, hardcore knives. We’re so used to talking about bottoms trusting tops. It seems so obvious: if you’re going to let somebody beat you up, stab you with needles, shove a fist up your ass, […]

Silhouette of a horned, bearded man against a lake of fire

When a Dom Drops Hard: Guest Post by Cowhideman

Silhouette of a horned, bearded man against a lake of fire

Today’s guest blogger is Cowhideman, the patient and prolific leader of FetLife’s Novices & Newbies group (login required). Crucially for us, he’s also brave enough to talk about the glory and horror of topspace. Enjoy! In a recent discussion thread, someone mentioned that their relatively novice Dom has suddenly shut down and very nearly stopped […]

A fiery background seen through a heart shape

Gasp, Shake, Thank You

A fiery background seen through a heart shape

This post is about me being hurt and frightened. Intensely. It made me very happy. But if it might bother you, please feel free to have some utterly misnamed Good Clean Fun instead. Negotiation: He leans back against the pillows. I perch opposite, bolt upright. It feels like lying every time I don’t call him […]

Gingerbread man cheerfully grating another gingerbread man

What Would Eric Pride Do?

Gingerbread man cheerfully grating another gingerbread man

This post is part of the Eek! series. As you may recall, I recently volunteered to demo bottom for an interrogation class by that diabolical genius, Eric Pride. En route to negotiation, knowing I was nervous, he casually mentioned some terrifying implements of pain. Then he stepped back to better enjoy my reaction. The man […]

Gingerbread man lowering another gingerbread man into toaster

Diabolical Genius, or I Love Interrogation

Gingerbread man lowering another gingerbread man into toaster

This post is part of the Eek! series. Also an e[lust] top three pick! Eric Pride is the devil. And a prince of tact. Um. Let me backtrack. I recently volunteered to help with Eric Pride’s interrogation class. I know nothing about interrogation, but this was not a problem, because I was to be the […]

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Review: “Anatomy of a Play Scene” by Eric Pride

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Review of presentation: “Anatomy of a Play Scene” by Eric Pride (DomSubFriends at Paddles NYC, 21 Feb 2013). I had always believed that playing with a brilliantly competent stranger couldn’t be as good as playing with a loved one. But Friday’s class shook that belief. You see, I thought it would be impossible to go […]