As you may remember, I have no shame about being female and therefore in a position of weakness. Nor do I feel particularly bad about being submissive and therefore wanting some such predicaments. But my masochism? Let’s not talk about it. No. Let’s talk about it. Masochism has a bad name. To the observer – … Continue reading Let’s Talk About Masochism
There’s an ache in your chest that hits sometimes when you’re a sub without a dom. I mean a real, physical ache. You want to grovel, you want to be cared for, you want to be done to. It hurts like hell. This has been heartbreakingly documented by Unspeakable Axe, who truly deserves his happy … Continue reading The Submissive Ache: Wanting and Waiting
My friends and I were not brought up to discuss sex, and so kink does not come up in conversation. But this has changed a little since I wrote my coming-out letter, because I have now come out to five more friends and one more brother (which is enough for now). As I expected, everyone was supportive. But … Continue reading Coming Out: The Sequel
Review of website: CollarSpace.com CollarMe.com (kinky personals). The morning after I signed up at CollarMe.com, I happened to start daydreaming about one of my favourite books, and a bolt of arousal shot through me. Normally this would not have been such a surprise, but I had believed I was dead between the legs due to … Continue reading Review: CollarMe.com and My Off Switch
BDSM: bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism. What does it feel like to need that kind of thing? One of my friends said, “It’s about fear, isn’t it?” Well, no, it’s not. I’m afraid of contact lenses and rollercoasters and they don’t do a thing for me. And I have been genuinely … Continue reading A Coming-Out Letter
When I was a sleep-deprived undergraduate, the only thing I got out of The Romance of the Rose was the lover finally getting to pluck the rose – yes, that’s exactly what you’re supposed to be thinking. Somehow I managed to miss this wonderful meeting point between medieval fealty and courtly love. And then I … Continue reading Collared: The Romance of the Rose
Eric Pride has left the community in the wake of pro-consent movements, stating that we have started tearing each other apart instead of standing by each other. I’m sad that he is not who I thought he was. Review of presentation: “Anatomy of a Play Scene” by Eric Pride (DomSubFriends at Paddles NYC, 21 Feb … Continue reading Review: “Anatomy of a Play Scene” by Eric Pride
Poor Robert Frost would be turning over in his grave. He probably wasn’t writing about masochism. And yet he said it for us. How the good stuff makes you feel real and alive and more. To Earthward Love at the lips was touch As sweet as I could bear; And once that seemed too much; … Continue reading Frost Nails Masochism
I love the traditional tropes of BDSM and slave fic – melting the dom’s dom, rescuing the fragile abused slave, Evil Is Sexy, mmmmm. But I also love it when authors turn these tropes inside out. Here are my favourites of this kind, fan fiction and original work, free and paid. They’re all completed works … Continue reading Subverted Tropes: The Fiction of the Unexpected
One of my close friends is a sadist. Some of her favourite stories fall squarely into my definition of horror. She is also terminally warm-hearted. She can’t finish reading some of my favourite stories because the ethical problems upset her so much. And she used to worry whether she was evil. This post is for … Continue reading The Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Sadists
